Watching someone you care about experience harm or abuse in a relationship can be deeply upsetting. If you’re trying to support them, please keep the following points in mind:
- Be there; just listen
- Don’t pressure to break up; this may drive them away from you
- Tell them it is not their fault
- Encourage them to get help; offer to go with them to see a counselor
- Offer to share written information on relationship abuse with them
- Don’t blame them by saying: “You’re stupid to stay with them” or “Why do you let them treat you like this?”
- BE SUPPORTIVE no matter what they decide to do
- Call the police if you witness physical violence
On average, victims attempt to leave an abusive relationship seven times before they succeed. Each time they try, support them with compassion and encouragement to make it a positive and empowering experience.
You may also have friends that are behaving abusively toward their partners. Here are some things to remember when attempting to help.
- Let them know their behavior is unacceptable and have a conversation about the consequences of their actions.
- Never laugh at or minimize abusive behavior — it’s serious and should be treated as such.
- Encourage them to seek help, and offer to go with them to talk to a counselor or other trusted professional.
- Be supportive of their partner; tell them no one deserves to be abused
- Get written information to share with them about abusive behavior
- Be a role model for healthy relationships by treating your partner and friends with respect